I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Randomize
