Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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