normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
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