the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
please come you make the beer taste better
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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