I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Randomize
