operation have a gay friend backfired
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
