Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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