the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
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