so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Randomize