The brown eye won't let me do that either.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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