Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
