so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
