YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
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