For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
Randomize