I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I want a musical about memes.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
