Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
I feel great
I just peed on a car
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
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