Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
