Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
