I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Why did my mother make you get naked?
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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