he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
So squirting runs in the family.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
I have post one night stand depression
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