He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
