Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
