New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
