Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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