Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Randomize