I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
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Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
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