I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize