dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Randomize
