i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize