you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
