WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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