Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
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