When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Houston, we have a squirter
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
