she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Randomize
