Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Randomize
