how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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