i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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