Texts From Last Night

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  (714): View more from California

  im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF

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  (714): im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF http://tfl.nu/bxu6
  Replies (12) Good night (2324) Bad night (631)
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  (631): View more from New York

  hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies

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  (631): hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies http://tfl.nu/d8pj
  Replies (34) Good night (7215) Bad night (983)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months

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  (919): I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months http://tfl.nu/8o8f
  Replies (10) Good night (2993) Bad night (3671)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.

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  (715): I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on. http://tfl.nu/3jom
  Replies (5) Good night (989) Bad night (2931)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.

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  (208): Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately. http://tfl.nu/dsn6
  Replies (2) Good night (1736) Bad night (1220)
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  (516): View more from New York

  Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment

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  (516): Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment http://tfl.nu/52np
  Replies (4) Good night (3138) Bad night (1504)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.

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  (207): I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered. http://tfl.nu/1qcp
  Replies (3) Good night (611) Bad night (760)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.

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  (970): Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms. http://tfl.nu/abxe
  Replies (4) Good night (1025) Bad night (468)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!

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  (406): We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?! http://tfl.nu/cb95
  Replies (3) Good night (577) Bad night (350)
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  (515): View more from Iowa

  He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?

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  (515): He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for? http://tfl.nu/vbci
  Replies (4) Good night (1189) Bad night (280)
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  I don't  care how much you're grieving  a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior. 

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  (501): I don't  care how much you're grieving  a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.  http://tfl.nu/bx8n
  Replies (2) Good night (449) Bad night (776)
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  (903): View more from Texas

  Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.

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  (903): Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head. http://tfl.nu/qt0n
  Replies (3) Good night (948) Bad night (323)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!

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  (720): Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?! http://tfl.nu/s1bh
  Replies (4) Good night (781) Bad night (306)
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  (714): View more from California

  I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.

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  (714): I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms. http://tfl.nu/fj21
  Replies (2) Good night (503) Bad night (328)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.

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  (850): We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going. http://tfl.nu/jid8
  Replies (2) Good night (381) Bad night (318)

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