Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
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