Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
