More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I cannot find my penis.
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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