my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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