Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.