He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Randomize