Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
