i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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