In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Randomize
