i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Randomize
