I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
false alarm, still single
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