He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
Randomize
