everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
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