At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
How naked do you want me to be?
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